


Ahomosayswhat?

by orphan_account



Category: Wayne's World (1992)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-14
Updated: 2019-05-14
Packaged: 2020-03-05 07:39:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,290
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18824155
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Odd bits of head canon





	Ahomosayswhat?

**Author's Note:**

> I couldn't sleep and also couldn't get this out of my head.  
> One of those odd little stories where if I don't post it right away I'll probably delete it.

It wasn't the first time they watched the music video for Madonna's Erotica video together that Wayne, his eyes never leaving the screen, put Garth's hand on the inside of his leg. They had popped it into the tape player enough times that they knew they didn't have to watch for Wayne's mom to pop up unexpectedly - the sound of the television muted - Aerosmith blaring. But not so many times that the video had lost its freshness, before the over-saturated black and whites of the video had become part of the background of their sexual imaginations.

Wayne had a way with Garth - he knew that if he tried something too soon, Garth would be overwhelmed and freak out. But if he waited too long, then it would be TOO unexpected and Garth would be overwhelmed and freak out. He even allowed enough plausible deniability that if Garth pulled his hand back, they could keep watching the video as if nothing happened. Wayne had hopes that they might even remain friends.

When Garth did not pull back after his hand brushed Wayne's erection. Wayne took a chance and casually laid his hand in Garth's lap as if it was something he'd done a million times. Garth was hard as well.

It began with dry rubbing over jeans and escalated quickly. They never took their eyes off the tv screen in front of them - looking at each other would make it too real. They both liked girls, right?

For a year or two that was their little afterschool ritual - something as reassuring as cookies and milk left out by Mom. It wasn't until Stacy showed up that girls were a real possibility.

Stacy went to the high school on the other side of town - the "nice" high school where their public access show was considered "kind of cool" in some circles. She had called the station for the address and showed up on Wayne's doorstep - custom made "Wayne's World" cap in hand. Dating her seemed strangely perfunctory - Wayne didn't remember ever asking her out. Stacy was a wave that Wayne allowed to carry him along.

Garth developed a rather intense crush on the donut girl at Stan Mikita's Donuts. She was exactly what Wayne would have expected Garth to like with classic pin-up looks. She seemed genuinely kind, outside of her position and was very patient with Garth's obvious crush. It was an attempt to set Garth up with her that led to them making their first movie. 

Garth had come into a chunk of money from a bit of code he wrote in his spare time - Wayne didn't really understand why flying toasters were such a big deal, but it was worth money to someone. Stacy only had boring ideas like using the money for college or a place of their own so Wayne broke up with her.

Things didn't go back to the way they were. Wayne had a girlfriend, so now, Wayne decided, it was Garth's turn.

Wayne already had the plan in mind. Come up with a reason to have Garth's dream woman on the show - that was the most obvious thing to do. Garth was usually able to push past his anxiety for the show - to help Garth with his anxiety was a big part of why they started all of those years ago. The money made something bigger possible.

"A movie? Are you mental?" Garth's eyes were on the sky above them, hands carefully arranged on his chest.

"It will be great. We'll do it like the show - there will be things we film going around our normal lives and there will be things we film for the movie. We'll have our friends and people we know act out stuff with us. It will be fun. We'll have the guys and Terry, the gang down at Stan Mikita's - I bet we could get permission to film some stuff at the Gasworks."

Garth was doubtful, but he paid the deposits for the cameras and film crew.

It worked out as Wayne hoped - even better. Meeting Cassandra over the year the movie was filmed was a definite bonus. Garth developed a relationship of sorts with his dream woman that was more motherly than romantic. When she wasn't the mysterious beauty behind the counter at the donut shop, she was a forty year old single mother named Gayle. But, after getting to know her while they filmed, Garth greeted her when they went in and he was a little less uptight around women so Wayne considered it a win overall.

None of them expected the movie to be a true success. It was supposed to be something they got the local cinema to play one weekend and biannually on channel 10 eventually becoming a cherished memory in a VHS clamshell on the bookshelf. Instead it became a regional success - they made back the deposits and socked away enough cash that they could move into their own place.

Wayne always knew his relationship with Cassandra would be transient - things dissolved between them almost as soon as she had a real record deal and began to tour. Garth didn't sleep well in their new apartment and spent many a night in Wayne's bed. Wayne was happy with the arrangement for himself, but he was concerned that Garth was missing out on a chance to meet his own chicks.

Free love - that was the answer. When Wayne got the impulsive idea to make a followup movie with an attached "Waynestock" concert no one told him what a stupid idea it was. The attitude seemed to be - everyone let him have his stupid idea last time and it turned out ok.

It was misguided from beginning to end - the worst idea being having Cassandra reprise her role as his girlfriend even though they had broken up some time ago. Seeing the way she lived the life of a "grown up" without him wrenched in his guts. Made the feeling of not mattering of not being anything worthwhile worse even before the whole thing sunk like the titanic.

The concert hemorrhaged money. Boxes of Waynestock merchandise would probably be a source of rags for the rest of their lives. There was enough money overall that they didn't go into debt, but they didn't make loads of cash. The concert itself barely broke even. While their first movie still sold on street corners, the second fell into obscurity and whatever interest had been ignited in their little show died off. They went back to doing what they always did. Even Stacy had finally stopped stalking him.

"I'm sorry, man." Wayne offered after they'd run the numbers.

"Sorry for what?" Garth asked.

Wayne was sorry for lots of things. Sorry that he had wasted so much of Garth's money. Sorry that Garth still hadn't had a girlfriend.

"I was hoping that maybe you'd meet some chicks - like real chicks. Chicks who would realize what a great guy you were."

"It's okay, Wayne." Garth told him. "As long as we're still best buds, you don' t have anything to be sorry about. My moolah is your moolah."

"Even if I spent all of that money on cocaine and hookers?"

"Did you share in this hypothetical example?"

"No."

"Why not?"

Wayne considered this.

"I just didn't want to."

"You couldn't not share the cocaine."

"What about the hookers?"

Garth didn't say anything for a long moment.

"You know, Wayne. I... I don't think maybe dating is for me. If you want to date girls, I'm ok with that but I just wanted to let you know...." Garth looked back and forth dramatically "ahomosayswhat."

"What?" Wayne was taken off guard.

"What?" Garth said back.

And then Wayne got it.


End file.
